The jigsaw

The pieces I join, no not of the jigsaw
Some big chunks, some tit bits here and there
I search each of them, for making a bigger picture
What are they I wonder, so badly torn to bits
With shredded and scratched parts
So badly beaten and torn apart

Some places I could feel the pulses
Some places had been smeared with tears
What could have gone so bad for these bits
To be so badly hurt and in pain
As if it was speaking my heart
And reflecting my inner self

Then, when I was mid way to joining
I realised what it was
Then I knew why it reflected me
My pain and wound so beautifully
I was joining together my own heart, torn in 1000 pieces
And trying to sew it together without knowing how badly torn I was!!!!

Poetic journal- a camouflage of emotions

Poems are in fact, the camouflage to feelings, where you can hide behind the rhymes and symbols, creating maze of words and entertaining yourself as well as the one who reads in puzzles of wordy illustrations. This is what I usually do, I write and hide behind it. It is more easier to express when it is not obvious, when you do not have to utter exactly the words that you want to communicate and yet you can get the message conveyed. 

But then, they are even symbol of confusion, depicting your nervousness and anxiety, your happiness and when you find it hard to believe it is happening. It is just like invisibility cloak of Harry Potter- smooth, silky and of exclusive quality and so intelligently woven that you can completely hide yourself yet be there. It is, in short, escape route, a vent to your raging emotions- good or bad. 

I have noticed myself, instead of filling pages of diaries that I previously did, I rather opted for rhyming my thought and coordinating my emotions with the words I typed, in short and abstract sentences shapes bluntly filling the lines of this blog. I wrote when I was heart broken or extremely happy, when I dreamed and when I thought I was falling short of one. It was sometimes very dark and blue and sometimes as vibrant and jovial to my readers, but for me it was the colour of shades that I wore in my heart and bore in my mind that very moment. Some poems are infact kiddish, some too abstract but each and every one of them are like daily journals of my life. 

I tried to keep them simple yet I filled them with symbols, you can imagine snowy day but it would be hard to depict the chill running through my thoughts when I scribbled every words. It is not just about me I write, I write about every freaking stupid stuff that moves me, makes me pensive or insure a giggle out of my throat. The words I write are my vision, my emotions are my sight and things I write- the final ones are my painting. I am yet to be Picasso, no I am not even near by him but I never wanted to be him. All I wanted was to share- either by poems or by scribbling of thoughts, writing the dimensions of complexities that I tangle myself with every day and I wish to continue it, forever. 

Leaving home!

I shall leave with memories behind
No footprints so that you can look
My images will then rush in your heart
But be never printed in any book

I am leaving a place called home
Not for it was warm with a roof
But for few hearts that brought me back
When I was running wild and aloof

Not that I am not glad to leave
Some shadows and some lurking souls
But more than that I am sad to lose
Few hands that I willingly hold

These strings that pull my heart
These feelings that move some tears
May be I made more friends than I thought
And more of those loving dears!!

As I pack my suitcase and tie my lace
I turn back to see what I left
But before you make me promise
I won't try paying back your debt!

The Mechanic!

Beer's perfume and lotion of grease

Not a candy boy you see on ramp
Smoking all night, changing wheels

His nights are day and has the sun for lamp!

He plays with spanner and chews a screw

Picking his teeth with copper wire
Pulls up those masts and mends the ship

His love, the only thing he ever admired

He is ruthless and sings loathing songs

As he changes the engine's comatose fate

Sleeps in its laps and sings lullaby

As if it were his some fancy date!

He is no maker and rather mends the things

And takes pride at his blue collar
He defies to rise and keeps his tag

Puffing tobacco wrapped in that new green dollar!

Mr. I-Won't-Never

Mr. I-Won't-Never had a wall 

E-Ya E-Ya O

But he never added friend over there

E-Ya E-Ya O

And he never ever took his call

E-Ya E-Ya O

Though he had two numbers shared to all

E-Ya E-Ya O

Mis call here, miss call there...

Miscall miscall everrrrrrrywhere

Mr. I-Won't-Never loved Heineken Beer
E-Ya E-Ya O
And roasted chicken he never shared
E-Ya E-Ya O
Mosquito coil was all that he cared
E-Ya E-Ya O
And his anger was all that he cheered
E-Ya E-Ya O
Angry here Angry there
Blindly angry everywhere

Mr I-Won't-Never held record changing wheel
E-Ya E-Ya O
But he never paid his cable's bill
E-Ya E-Ya O
He felt so much of BIG DEAL
E-Ya E-Ya O
And takes more than a week to chill
E-Ya E-Ya O
Shouting here, shouting there
Screaming in my scared two ears!

I choose to be poor!

Silver was for spoon

Bed made of gold

I had everything you would wish for

More than a king could hold

Ferrari was my mower 

Bentley to take me school

Yet I chose for my ten toes

Though you would call me a fool!!!

Dollars no longer tore my shirt

Nor did cheques burden me
Street vendors dazzled me more than malls

And I fell out of love with the Lee

It liberated my soul, I guess

For I loved the frost, wind and scorching sun

Ways of poor lured me out

And made me take this wilder run

I now, Dear Dad, would live this life

You can keep the green stack for our own

'Coz this is how I want to look at the sky

Exploring more than you have ever shown

For this makes me what I want to be

A fisherman rejoicing in his fiery shore

I dot to swim till I get to sea

though born rich, I thus choose to be poor

I want to find my own little stream

Through which I shall boat to the shore

I want to turn the page and earn every dime

I was born rich but I now choose to be poor

Soul contract!

Can I trade in crossroad, I ponder
My soul for you to live
Will you miss me, I  then wonder
For truest of love, I always give

Or shall you go to the rosy dames
Who lost your heart many times
And some of them who dug your pockets
Till they tricked you out of every dime!

Leggy babes and lashing tongues
Smoking fire as they burn
Shall give you company as you pick
Queuing up for their heavenly turn

You will be pleased, I am sure
But will you ever miss these lousy lips
That ever spoke out is you name
When they were lost in passionate kiss

I don't know if you will know these eyes
When they shall pass in crowded street
Or shall you give me a vacant stare
Ignoring there's more than eyes can meet?

I wonder my love, all this time
As I sign my soul for your breath
You shall live and fall in love again
When I shall succumb to the death




Still when you trade heart for love again
Will you ever dream of my freckled face
With teary eyes and longing smile
Calling you for the last embrace?

The colours

Bright blue yellow pink
Melt down in my sink 
And they I realise
So colourful otherwise

Giggles, smiles and chirpy laugh
But why my heart does it half
I wonder all the time
All that couldnt be mine

Through the colour
And the Rainbows
Through the chords
Or voices of the strings

Through the veins
when Message pass
You are happy
More than you could ask

Look on, check out
In spam or trashed out
Where are they
The lil texts they would sayyyyy..

Smileeeeee on...and this shall pass
Hold one and you will make
Don't give up but can I know
What you said bout walk on cake??

I wonderrrrrrr, the colours
As they dance awayyyy
Could it be, the colours that
Neverrrrr came my way!!!

Wings of fire!

The wings of fire
They are burning me alive
And am flying as I die
Somewhere in the sky
Looking on to you as I say good bye!


The wings of fire
They are burning me alive
Amidst the stars as I lie
Somewhere in the galaxy, up in the sky
Waving at you the last good bye!!!

The wings of fire
They turned me to ashes
As tears fall wetting my lashes
When my past flashes
And emotion with reasoning clashes

The wings of fire
Shall free me when am gone
reaching out to the burning sun
As I end my farewell song
It shall not take any long!!!!

The wings of fire
Are burning me alive
As I wave you good bye
To join the stars who never die
To galaxies who are always mine

They are burning me alive
They are burning till I die!!

My Chords (the rockstar in me)

With a broken guitar, I shall have a chord in my name
Will name it S major or minor, but sing it the same
The crowd then shall join, singing with the tune
A phoenix then shall rise again, from its burning doom

They will not air in your radio or in your juke
Nor will narrate story that you love to look
But it shall stream through my veins and my breath    
Spreading in the frequencies, until I meet the death

Like I am-- an outlaw, so will be my chord
The one made to cheer my heart when it was blue and bored
The music, alas has no rule that you have set
As for you, it no longer sings if limits are not met

But my song, my friend, plays happily for all
For one with the rules or an outcast, one big or small
It reaches for hearts and pulls their strings
One that airs in every lips and thats how it shall stream

For, I shall be the rockstar, my songs with tunes of beat
That rhythms with dub-lub as arteries do leap
One that would be with no rules to bind
One that shall not be measured in scales of mind

For, my chords would be free to spread their wings
Flying through the rainbows and colouring the dreams
Thats how my friend, shall my music sound
Streaming through the hearts and breaking every bound